Too many baby showers, not enough weddings.

As I sat in my chair at my friends bridal shower earlier today I couldn't help but think "why do I go to more baby showers, than bridal showers?" It was a beautiful sunny day in February, perfect for a celebration of love. Family and friends gathered to share in the first of many joyous occasions this couple will be sharing. "First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes John Doe with the baby carriage." I am not here to tell you what is right for you as a person, or what may or may not work in your relationship. I simply feel that these days young women forget that having a baby with someone ties you to that person for life. Having a baby is hard work. It upsets me when women who aren't in committed relationships think that having a baby is going to be the savior to their relationship. This isn't a temporary fix to see if your relationship is going to work out. A baby is a human being who in several circumstances is just being used as bait to keep a man, sometimes leading to disappointment by a man not willing to take on the responsibility of being a father. 

Seriously speaking, who wants to be a single parent? It's already hard work to raise a child when you have someone there to do it with you, why knowingly put yourself in that situation? I'm not knocking the people who do it, on the contrary, more power to them. But I'm sure if you ask them now they would tell you if they could turn back time, without regretting the birth of their child, they would. Celebrating love is so beautiful and amazing. Seeing my friend and her fiancee interact today showed me that at least I'm not the only young person who values tradition. I understand there are things sometimes beyond our control, and I will never bash someone for something that may end up happening to me. Think about it, you know you've been to more than one baby shower where the father is not around. I'm sure that as happy as the new mother is for the pending birth of her child, there's still that piece of her who wishes to have the man who helped her create this miracle be there. 

Marriage may not be for everyone, and that is understandable. I'm not saying that everyone needs to go by the book. This is gearing more towards the younger women who just get pregnant without thinking of the life she may end up living.I know so many young women who get pregnant and hold on to the illusion that everything will work out between her and her baby's father. I always pray that it does.You never want to see your friends hurting over something so important. What I did realize today, more than ever is that I do want to get married and have the notion that this man is fully committed to our relationship and raising our children together. It just seems like the right thing for me to do. If this isn't what you want, fine. Just be smart about your decisions and remember that this is a life-long decision, it's not a quick-fix. You can't always control the outcome of a situation, but you can definitely try to gear them in the direction you find most suitable for you.